Or any other form of social media!

My name is Mark Wayman, and for the last eleven years I have owned an Executive Recruiting firm focused on gaming and high tech. Compensation starts at $100,000; last year I placed eight executives north of a million dollars.

This article is about social media, and how it can sabotage your career search.  Most Executive Recruiters use the process outlined below, so here are several issues to be aware of with Facebook, LinkedIn, the Internet and Email.

LinkedIn – When a candidate sends a Recruiter a resume, whether that is a Recruiter at the hiring company, or a third party Executive Recruiter, the first stop is usually LinkedIn.  Specifically, does the LinkedIn profile match the resume?  Companies, titles, tenures.  A surprising number of people are not honest, and any discrepancy between the resume and LinkedIn is a red flag to a Recruiter.  Make sure your LinkedIn profile is accurate and your picture is professional.  Recently dealt with an executive who’s LinkedIn profile photo was him drinking with his buddies at a nightclub.  I’m not here to judge, only to make you aware that unprofessional photos will get your resume sent to the round file.  For those that say, “I can do whatever I want – this is America!”, we have a name for that – “an obsessive need to be me.”  You can do whatever you want, but you will be passed over for jobs.

Facebook, Part 1 – This can be a huge deal breaker!  Recruiters check out the profile photo to get more insight into their character.  Plenty of people are technically competent, however Recruiters are paid to get the very best.  And the best don’t post a picture of them getting tanked at a nightclub.  Or with a girl on their lap at a Strip Club.  I kid you not – these are real life examples.  I know a CFO that did this, and he has been headed down the slippery slope ever since.  He used to be a world class company; now he is at a small, mediocre company.  You have heard it before – never post anything on Facebook you would not want on the front page of the newspaper.  Set your privacy settings to “friends only.”  Same goes for Instagram, Pinterest and any other social media platform.  Use common sense.

Facebook, Part 2 – There is another “gotcha” with Facebook; controversial issues.  If you get wrapped up in debates over politics, religion, or other high profile issues, you better have your privacy settings on “friends only.”  Personally, I use Facebook to see what my friends are up to.  Anyone that posts negative, controversial comments…gets unfriended.  I just want to see pictures of the kids!

The Internet – What comes up when you Google your name?  DUI?  Lawsuit?  Naked pictures?  You are laughing, but I have seen all three multiple times.  Let me tell you what companies DON’T want…bad actors.  Executives with personal issues – drug/alcohol abuse, litigation happy employees, and those recently fired for an inappropriate relationship.  You can use a service like Reputation.com to help you.  Not endorsing them, just giving you an example.  Make sure your top search results on Google paint you in a positive light.

Email – Finally, last buy not least, make sure your email address is professional.  Mine is “mwayman.”  Pretty straightforward, yes?  I have seen everything from “HookUpDude” to “AmysBoyToy”.  If want to be cute, have two email addresses, one for personal and one for business.  And never, ever inquire about a job from your work email.  See it all the time, and most companies these days do monitor business email.

Let me preface this with the fact that many of you will disagree with me. And by the grace of God, we live in the United States where everyone is entitled to their opinion. We can agree to disagree! This article is based on my ten years on LinkedIn, the mistakes I made, and the model that is successful.

In the Beginning of LinkedIn – I was an early adopter of LinkedIn and connected to everyone that asked. The more people you connect to, the better your network, right? Within 30 days I was overwhelmed with requests for introductions and referrals. My favorite was, “You know Zappos CEO Tony Hsieh, can you introduce me, I want to sell him something.” That is the equivalent of going to a networking event and throwing business cards at people. If I sent those people to Tony Hsieh he would bury me in a hole in the desert. So I quickly removed the connections of folks anyone I did not know personally. Problem solved. You know why? Because your real friends rarely ask for favors.

No Cold Calls – Cold calling Recruiters on LinkedIn is the equivalent of applying to online job postings. I get ten to twenty per day. Keep in mind that Executive Recruiters get people for jobs….not jobs for people. Recruiters focus on executives they know personally and those referred by a trusted source. Representing candidates that cold call requires too much due diligence. If you are looking for a job, work your professional network – people you actually know.

The Treadmill of Life – My first priority is family and friends. Then I run my Executive Recruiting business. Finally, I give back by donating my time to charity. If you are busy like me (and you are!), you prioritize your time, and can’t take on the requests of all the people cold calling you on LinkedIn. This is why I won’t connect to people I don’t know. About 95% of the time they have an agenda. We call it the “oh, by the way” connection. You get a long winded email that ends with, “Oh, by the way, can you introduce me to Bill Gates and Warren Buffett?” Focus is a key attribute of successful executives, so they need to focus on their business. No disrespect intended.

You MUST add Value – This is REALLY important. Successful executives are looking for relationships, not transactions. Top executives have hectic schedules and deal with tons of white noise. You need to have a strong value proposition if you want to get noticed. My motto is, “If there is a strong value proposition on both sides of the introduction, I’m happy to help.” As an example, here is my personal value proposition. First, the obvious one – I get people jobs. That definitely comes in handy at some point. Second, I have a monthly newsletter that goes out to 5,000 executives. Who got hired, who got fired. Much of that information is not public knowledge, and there is great value to keeping up with the latest industry happenings. Third, I host quarterly mixers for my friends, clients and business partners. This is NOT a networking event, just a chance for my friends to meet each other. How much value is there to meeting 50 of the best executives, entrepreneurs and venture capitalists on the planet?

Some Do, Some Don’t – Not everyone will want to be on your bus. Don’t be offended. I have a saying, “Lord, send me $20 for every person that kicked dirt on me or treated me poorly, then sent me a resume when they got fired.” There are several legitimate reasons that people won’t get back to you. First, maybe they are facing a health crisis. Second, maybe they are having personal issues with their spouse or kids. Third, they may be in the middle of a work related crisis. Any of these situations can be a life encompassing, so don’t be offended if you are not their top priority.

One of the most common questions I get from both hiring companies and candidates is, “Why should I use an Executive Recruiter?” GREAT question! There is a Recruiter on every corner. Would love to tell you they are all lovely people. They are not. That stated, there are very valid reasons to partner with an Executive Recruiter. One disclaimer – keep in mind that Executive Recruiters get people for jobs, not jobs for people.

Value Proposition for the Hiring Company – Why would you spend money on an Executive Recruiter? Well, there are two things I know for certain. First, the person you want to hire is not going to apply online. Second, if you hire the wrong person and they leave in six months, THAT…is expensive. Outlined below are several benefits to using an Executive Recruiter. Would love to take credit for these, however most of them were provided by my clients.

• Hire the Best People the First Time – Want the best person for the job? Either identify someone in your professional network (a great idea!) or engage an Executive Recruiter. I don’t care how many HR people tell you, “We got this.” They do not. They don’t have the connections; they don’t have the access. Again, I’m talking about $100,000+ executives. They are all gainfully employed, NOT applying for online jobs, and NOT taking cold calls from an HR person. For the record, there are some top notch HR executives, however most are overwhelmed with personnel issues and not equipped to do executive search. There are just not enough hours in the day. So I’ll say it again – ACCESS. Executive Recruiters have access to the best executives on the planet.
• Identify the Good Guys; Avoid the Bad Guys – Many companies ignore this completely. Big mistake. Candidates don’t put their alcohol, drug and gambling addictions on their resumes. DUIs, foreclosures, bankruptcies, embezzlement, inappropriate relationships and litigation happy employees. We are not talking about one or two people. I can rattle off the names of a dozen million dollar executives with major personal issues. Executive Recruiters have intimate knowledge of their candidates. In my case, I have known most of my executives for ten to twenty years. I know their families, their hobbies, their positive and negative qualities. Can quote the hiring company scripture and verse on each one.
• “A” Executives Don’t Apply Online – Anyone that tells you “great” candidates apply online is…wrong. Been in the business for eleven years and I have 5,000 executives in my rolodex. I assure you that million dollar “C” level executives don’t cruise LinkedIn looking for a job. They are gainfully employed. Inaccessible. Unobtainable. The Executive Recruiter has access and can make the phone calls to the right candidates.
• Stop Getting Gang Tackled by Candidates – When you post a senior level job, get ready to be gang tackled by 200 unqualified candidates. They will email you, ping you on LinkedIn, and call your office. They may even show up in person to hand you a resume. And they all share one attribute – they are not qualified for the job. The Executive Recruiter thins the herd, keeps your valuable time protected, and only submits the best two or three candidates.
• Save Time, Save Money – You may think it’s cheaper to let HR place Monster.com ads, but remember one thing – you can get more of everything in life except TIME. Would you rather run the business or sort through the resumes of unqualified candidates? Is it worth it to have an Executive Recruiter save you a hundred hours of interview time by providing the three best candidates? If you hire the wrong person on your own and they leave after six months, how much does that cost? In the long run, it is more cost-effective to hire the right person the first time around.
• One Day You Will Need That Bridge – Always build the bridge before you need to cross the river. Some will say this is self-serving, but there will come a day when you need an Executive Recruiter. They seem REAL expensive…until you are unemployed and need one. Lord, send me $100 for every guy that told me he would never need me, then got fired and sent me a resume. Make it $200 for the HR executives please. It never hurts to be friendly with one or two good Executive Recruiters. If nothing else, they can keep you apprised of marketing conditions.

Value Proposition for the Candidate – Keep in mind that at $100,000+, 90% of all jobs come from your professional network or an Executive Recruiter. Applying online is a 1% proposition. For every senior level job, there are 500 applicants. Only one can be selected. Top executives never, ever apply online. Here is the value proposition for working with an Executive Recruiter.

• The BEST Jobs – Plain and simple. Anyone that tells you otherwise…is wrong. For this reason alone, if you are at a senior level, you should have relationships with two or three Executive Recruiters. Most of the jobs they work on ARE NOT POSTED. Companies keep them off the radar. Maybe the company wants to make discrete changes or the incumbent has not been fired yet. Most of the best jobs are never posted.
• Less Competition – If you are selected, mostly likely you will be one of three candidates competing, as opposed to the 500 that apply online. Your odds of landing the position are much better.
• No Lousy Companies – Executive Recruiters only work with the best companies. Riddle me this, which company would you rather work for? One that spends $100 on a CareerBuilder ad, or one that pays an Executive Recruiter $50,000 to find the best candidate? Do you know why they place online jobs? They are CHEAP! An Executive Recruiter can tell you which companies are “hot” and which ones …are a lousy place to work.
• Market Conditions – Executive Recruiters do this 24×7. They know the market conditions. Back in 2008, there was a flood of candidates, and most of them were under the mistaken impression they would find a job in 30 days…AND get a raise. Many never worked again. The Executive Recruiter can tell you how strong the hiring market is, and where you need to be on compensation.
• Compensation – Most common mistake by candidates? Not pricing their house to sell. They are making $100,000, but believe they are worth $200,000. An Executive Recruiter can assess your education and experience, then give you your “market value.” And trust me; they will be pretty darn close.
• Executive Recruiters are Great Negotiators – Since they are your Agent, they can negotiate your compensation package. The last thing you want is to fight about nickels and start the job on the wrong foot. The Executive Recruiter will know exactly where the company wants to be on compensation, so you are assured of getting an equitable offer.

This is the last and final article in my series about what makes a GREAT million dollar candidate. Given that most senior level executives are placed through Executive Recruiters, we’ll focus this last article on how to interact with them.

The Executive Recruiter is your Agent – When an Executive Recruiter submits you for a job, it is NOT a referral or introduction. They are your agent of record for twelve months. If you get hired, they get paid. Let the Executive Recruiter manage the process, and follow their directives. If you end run the process, there is a good chance you will be withdrawn from consideration. I regularly get candidates that try to brush me aside once the interview process commences with, “Thanks for the introduction.” No, I’m your Agent. Just as an Actor or Actress has an agent, the Executive Recruiter is your Agent to the hiring company. Never, ever burn the bridge with the Recruiter. It’s a small, small world.

What We Have Here is a Failure to Communicate – You want to communicate the RIGHT amount. Not too much; not too little. Be sure to keep the Executive Recruiter in the loop when you receive communication from the hiring company. When you are scheduled to interview. When you have feedback after the interview. If I had $20 for every candidate that failed to keep me in the loop, and then asked me to set their apple card back up after the interview process fell apart…I would be very wealthy. The only way an Executive Recruiter can property represent you is if you communicate. On the other hand, candidates that over communicate and ask for hourly/daily updates will soon find themselves persona non grata. The Recruiter may have 50 to 100 executives interviewing. Trust me; they don’t get paid unless you get the job, so they are on the case. Emailing them every morning just paints you as desperate.

When You are Unemployed, All Jobs are Good Jobs – Most Executive Recruiters will ask you some preliminary questions about compensation, relocation and background. Be HONEST. They don’t care if you made $20,000 or $2,000,000, they are simply trying to match you to a job. Unemployed candidates are a special situation. At the million dollar level, no company wants to interview unemployed executives. Sorry, not being rude or disrespectful, just honest. Recently asked an unemployed executive for his base salary. He said $400,000. I responded, “No, you are making ZERO. You don’t have a job.” Surprisingly, I was able to get him interviewed for a $600,000 job. He told me that was not enough money. I kid you not. True story! I dropped him like a hot rock. So my point is this – if you are not gainfully employed, you need to consider all reasonable offers.

This is Part 2 in my series about what makes a great million dollar candidate. It’s funny how so many candidates say, “Oh, I don’t need that. I’m a great candidate.” My response is, “No disrespect, then why are you unemployed?” The truth is that 80% of candidates don’t get hired because of the exact situations I describe in this series. Wonderful, highly talented executives that either don’t understand the hiring process or make rookie mistakes. Here we go!

Everyone Loves Happy, Smiley People – Only children whine…and even then it’s not attractive. A significant percentage of executive candidates that approach me are angry and bitter. Mostly because they got fired or laid off. They blame it on their old boss, the company, their parents, their spouse, their kids, their dogs. Let’s make something perfectly clear – bitter is not attractive. And interviewers will pick up on your bad attitude in 60 seconds and the interview will be over. Had a candidate that was a great fit for a CIO role. During the interview process the CEO said, “How did end up here when you were in Dallas for so many years?” The candidate responded, “I was involved in a nasty divorce. Let me tell you about it.” I kid you not. You can’t make this stuff up. Let it go! The day you left your company and boss stopped caring about you. They don’t care about you. Why should you obsess about it? Million dollar candidates have happy, well-adjusted attitudes.

Don’t Be The Smartest Guy in the Room – Hubris is not attractive, and make no mistake, big egos are a major challenge with million dollar candidates. The interview is not a competition where you convince the interviewer you are smarter than Bill Gates. Your intent should be to help the company understand how your education and experience relates to their job role. If you alienate the interviewer, even if they are an HR Generalist, they won’t move you forward in the interview process. I remember one candidate that was one of three finalists for a huge job. He emailed the CEO of the company, “As you know, I’m much smarter than the other two guys, so I know you will pick me and I look forward to working with you.” True story. Million dollar candidates are humble and genuine.

The World Has Changed: Be Realistic on Compensation – Top candidates are realistic about compensation. Every once in a while I hear, “You know, I used to make a million dollars back in the day.” Guess what? That was then, this is now…the world changed. I regularly see executives chasing compensation and end up unemployed for a year. Some never worked again. I had one candidate at $400K that ended up out of work for two years, then took a job for $200K. Remember this, when you are unemployed…all jobs are good jobs. Companies want to hire gainfully employed executives. Be realistic about compensation or you could end up on the beach for a very long time.

A question that comes up frequently is, “What makes a great million dollar candidate?” So here are three attributes that hiring companies and Executive Recruiters look for in “A” (the best) candidates.

Integrity – As one CEO profoundly stated, “Show me executives of integrity. Without integrity, I don’t care how talented or smart they are.” Translated, be honest and up front about your education, experience, recent compensation…everything! For hiring companies and Executive Recruiters, INTEGITY is the number one attribute. Placed a candidate several years ago, and when we checked on his last compensation package, it was much lower than he disclosed. Not good. Honesty is the best policy. Right about now you are saying, “Hard to believe in a million dollar executive.” I completely agree with you, however probably have this issue a dozen times a year.

Confidentiality – This one boggles my mind. I tell candidates a position is CONFIDENTIAL and send them a PDF of “Candidate Etiquette” that clearly states, “If you don’t keep all information 100% confidential, you will be removed from consideration.” Yet it’s an issue over and over. In many cases the incumbent has not been terminated yet, and the last thing the hiring company needs if for that person to hear about it through the grapevine. Most candidates that violate confidentiality figure it’s no big deal because they will never talk to the hiring company or Executive Recruiter again. But always remember what Walt Disney said, “It’s a small, small world.” Keep your trap shut!

Focus on Opportunity – If you start out asking about the bonus, benefits and if they will cover dry cleaning, you are setting yourself up for failure. YES, compensation is important. Anyone that tells you money is not important…does not have any. That stated, top executives focus on OPPORTUNITY. Is the company financially stable? Is there upward mobility? Is their skill set aligned with the need? Are they a strong cultural fit. These questions are far more important than whether you get a car allowance. Two side notes. First, if you are interviewing for a million dollar job, you DO want to discuss the base salary up front to ensure you are “in range.” I know a guy that interviewed multiple times, then received an offer below his expectation. I asked him, “So let me get this straight, you flew across the United States to interview and never asked what the job paid?” Second, don’t think you are going to interview for something at $200,000, then when you get the offer say, “I want $250,000.” Really bad idea. Kind of goes back to the issue of integrity. If you agreed to $200,000 up front, that is what you get. Had a candidate do this a few years back. Hiring company dropped him like a hot rock and I’m lucky they did not bury me in a hole in the desert.

People that don’t return messages is a hot button for me. My Dad taught me to treat people with respect, which includes returning your calls and messages. It’s just the right thing to do. I personally return every call and email (several hundred a day), even if my answer is a simple, “No thank you.”

So why don’t people call you back? In my business, Executive Recruiting, timely responses are critical to hiring top executives. If the hiring company is slow or unresponsive, a strong candidate will three other job offers and be long gone. Here are a few possible reasons why your call was not returned.

No Value Proposition – This is by far the most common reason: your subject is not important to them. It you have a great value proposition like free tickets to Bruce Springsteen or a job with a 25% pay increase, you will always get called back. Unfortunately, most people only call to ask for something. A job, investments, introductions. That is not a strong value proposition. Actually, that is you calling in favors, not offering value. Here is a great story that illustrates the point. I’m hosting a mixer at the Foundation Room and talking with the CIO of a Fortune 500 company. A sales guy from Cisco walks over and says to the CIO, “Hey, I left you a bunch of messages and you did not get back to me.” The CIO did not miss a beat and responded, “Do you know why? I’m the CIO of a $10B company, and I have a fleet of people that deal with buying routers. It’s not on my radar; buying hardware is not a priority for me.” The higher your value proposition, the more quickly your calls will be returned.

Your Topic is Not a Priority – Most people are running on the treadmill of life these days. One long, continuous air raid siren. Too much to do and not enough time. The second big reason people don’t return your call because they have other priorities. Your topic is undoubtedly a priority for you, however it may not make their radar screen. No one is going to drop everything they are doing for a topic that is not a priority for them. They are not trying to be rude, just preoccupied with something more important.

CEOs are Busy, Busy, Busy – Business Owners and CEOs are REALLY busy. Be patient. Getting your calls returned takes time. That is no disrespect to you, more a function of the CEOs schedule. My model is to email the person, then wait a week. If there is no response, I’ll follow up with a second email. Still nothing? Then I pick up the phone and call them directly. And for any situation that is HIGH PRIORITY, I skip the emails and pick up the phone. Understand that senior executives have their hands full, so give them a few days to respond.

Health Issues – When you are down with the flu and a fever, the last thing you care about is checking your email. Or maybe they have a sick Mother or child. Family health issues trump pretty much everything, including your email or phone call.

Travel – When I travel, I only respond to high priority client messages. Too much work to write extensive emails on an iPad. Again, if it’s important, I can call them on the phone. And how about people that send an email, then call you ten minutes later to ask, “Did you get my email?” Well yeah, probably, but I don’t stare at my computer screen all day waiting for you to send me something. Personally, I check messages twice a day. Available by phone from 5:00 AM to 5:00 PM, then the phone gets turned off. Nothing is so important that it won’t wait until the morning. Keep in mind that when executives are on the road, it may take a few days for your call to be returned.

You are no Longer “The Man” – You find out who your friends are when you are unemployed. All the people that used to call asking for favors no longer return your calls. Why? Because they know you are looking for a job, and they either can’t help or don’t want to. Don’t feel bad, they were never your friends, just acquaintances. Your career situation is an emergency for you, not them.

Background – My name is Mark Wayman and for the last ten years I have owned an Executive Recruiting company focused on gaming/casinos and high tech. This year I placed six executives north of a million dollars. My last article was titled “What Josh Altman (Million Dollar LA Listing) Taught Me About Networking.” I’ll give you the conclusion to the Josh Altman experience at the end of the article. Today’s focus is on one of my primary business principles for success – SHOWING UP.

The Godfather Sit Downs – Many years ago I started hosting mixers in Las Vegas, Los Angeles and Palo Alto. Invite-only for my friends, clients and business partners. Guest list is “C” level corporate executives, entrepreneurs, venture capitalists, entertainers. Exactly one purpose – for my friends, clients and business partners to meet each other. Exactly one rule – absolutely no selling, marketing, promoting of soliciting. Just an OPPORTUNITY to meet 70 high quality people at an attractive venue with no pressure or agenda.

The No Shows – The most interesting part of my private events is how many people DON’T show up! Yeah, yeah, yeah, we are all busy, but you miss out on 100% of the shots you don’t take. Someone once said that “good luck” is mostly hard work and showing up. By ducking out, you accomplish three things. First, you miss out on meeting new people and creating new relationships. Second, you miss out on any opportunities that might present themselves. Third, you may not get invited back!

No Shows for Charity Events – Especially disappointing are folks that don’t show up for charity events. On several occasions I had people drop out after I paid $1,000 for their seats. Mediocre people are “no show, no call”. Good people will give you plenty of notice and offer to donate to the charity. Let me tell you what “no call no show” translates to, “Our relationship is not important to me. You are not important to me.” And that, my friends, is a bad deal. The host gets offended and certainly does not strengthen the relationship. Ten years ago my mixers had a 20% “no show” rate. Today, 3% because the “no show no calls” don’t get invited back.

My Favorite No Show Story – One of my favorite stories is about a CIO event I hosted at Hollywood Park. Of the 30 CIOs on the guest list, only 15 showed up. The day after the event, two of the “no show, no calls” sent me resumes and asked for jobs. Seriously? I have never met you, you don’t show up for an hour to meet in person and shake hands, but you want me to place you in a $400,000 job? I love that strategy!

Acceptable Reasons – Obviously there are emergencies and valid reasons for not having to cancel. Here are a few good ones:

• Sick or Medical Emergency – Completely understandable. Things happen, and family always come first. But being “tired” does not count. We are all tired; we are all busy. I once hosted and Oscar Party for the Arthritis Foundation with a 104 degree fever. Five hundred people were counting on me, so I dragged myself out of bed and honored the commitment. My wife once attended a dinner party when she was REALLY under the weather. She made the best of it and had hot toddies all night.
• Client Related – For my entrepreneur friends, if you don’t sell…you don’t eat. This one I am intimately familiar with. If you own the business and need to focus on a client situation, that is perfectly acceptable.
• Work Related – For my celebrity friends, if they get a paid gig…they are out. For my CEO friends, sometimes critical issues come up and as the #1 in the company, they need to give it their full attention.

Not so Acceptable Excuses – There are too many excuses to mention. I have seen and heard them all. Here are a few common ones:

• I’m Too Important – Yeah, I don’t know about that. The folks at my event are high profile, highly successful, and in many cases, high net worth. If you don’t show up though, you will never know.
• Too or Busy – We are all busy. I get 50 phone calls and 400 emails a day, however if I make a commitment to attend, I keep it. For my personal event, the value proposition of meeting 70 executives is HUGE. Where are you going to meet 70 high quality people, all in one place, and all in one night?
• Bigger Name on the Other Line – This is a hot button for me. You made the commitment, and now you have a “cooler” offer. Personally, I don’t do that. If I say I’ll be there, I’ll be there. OK, maybe if Jesus calls, I will need to duck out, but not for anyone else.
• Sounded Like a Good Idea at the Time – This is probably the most frequent excuse. And when I look at my guest lists, I can almost always pick out the ones that won’t show. They are the people that drive you crazy trying to get ON the list…then don’t show up. All I can say is you are going to miss out on many, many opportunities.

So Josh Altman and I were supposed to meet prior to my last Los Angeles event. He emailed me just prior and said he had another commitment. Don’t really know him, and I’m sure he had a great reason. That stated, he missed out on an opportunity to meet an executive with 5,000+ executives in his rolodex. Next!

Million Dollar Listing is a reality TV show about Real Estate Brokers in Los Angeles, New York and Miami. Josh Altman is on the LA version, and one of the top brokers in Southern California. Love this show, which is about Realtors selling multi-million dollar homes.

As an Executive Recruiter, I’m in that same business. Josh matches buyers and million dollar houses; I match companies with million dollar executives. Josh hosts Brokers Open events; I host Godfather Sit Downs for my clients, friends and business partners. The part of Million Dollar Listing I enjoy most is when a Realtor is negotiating a home price since I spend much of my day negotiating executive compensation packages.

Ten years ago I started hosting my own private mixers after attending a dozen “open to the public” networking events. Anything that is open to the public is going to have subsets of solicitors, professional networkers and folks that showed up for the free drinks. No disrespect; just not my thing. So I created The Godfather’s Sit Down. We have exactly one purpose – for my friends, clients and business partners to meet each other. We have exactly one rule – absolutely no selling, marketing, promoting or soliciting. Invite 30 of my friends and each person is allowed to bring one new guest. Half the crowd is my friends; the other half is new and exciting executives. Guest list is “C” level corporate executives, entrepreneurs, venture capitalists and entertainers. Very diverse and eclectic group.

Back to Josh Altman. Invited Josh to attend my Godfather Sit Down in Hollywood. Interestingly enough, we did not have a single common friend on LinkedIn; however keep in mind that “weak networks” where you don’t share common friends are of great value since you are connecting two BIG networks. Here are the four lessons I took away from my interaction with Josh:

Return All Your Messages – When I emailed Josh, he responded immediately. Many executives only return messages that are self-serving. Although I understand the concept, my personal business model is to return every email and phone call, even if my answer is “no thank you.” Why? Because it’s the right way to treat people. Although Josh did not know me, he was professional enough to return my message. That immediately puts him in the top 2% of people I know.

No Risk, No Reward – Which brings us to lesson two: no risk, no reward. As Wayne Gretzky said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Josh took a risk by getting back to me. He has plenty of other things on his plate, however he probably Googled and saw that I’m well connected in Las Vegas, Los Angeles and the Silicon Valley. And there is great value in knowing well connected executives.

The Larger Your Network, The Larger Your Opportunity – Recently read a book on “luck” that stated “the larger your network, the luckier you get.” Why? Because the more people you know, the more opportunities they will forward your way. In my case (Executive Recruiter), the more executives I know, the better my chance of making job placements.

The Town Called Someday – Josh could not make my Hollywood event, so he offered to meet at lunch. My schedule was jammed full, however rather than walk away, we did the sacred calendar sync and found a mutually agreeable one hour time slot. While many people are living in the town of “Someday”, Josh and I made the meeting happen. As Jim Lovell once said, “There are people who make things happen, there are people who watch things happen, and there are people who wonder what happened. To be successful, you need to be a person who makes things happen.”

My name is Mark Wayman and for the last ten years I have owned an Executive Recruiting company focused on gaming/casinos and high tech. Placed 600+ executives from $100,000 to $2,000,000. Although most of these tips are targeted for senior level executives, they can be applied to all jobs.

While most books focus on what TO do, my book “The Godfather’s Career Guide – What To Do If You Get Whacked” (Amazon) focuses on what NOT to do. Here are a few amusing stories with some very poignant lessons.

Being a Narcissistic Megalomaniac – The number one reason that candidates do not move forward in the interview process – ARROGANCE and EGO. No one likes a self-absorbed, self-serving elitist. Just about the worst candidate I ever represented, we’ll call him Mike, was an outstanding executive that could not get over himself. One of those guys that says, “Enough about you, let’s talk about me some more!” Met him for breakfast and told him he needed to ratchet the self-promotion down a bit to be successful. At the next interview he tells the CEO, “I wouldn’t work here. You guys are a hot mess.” He was unemployed for two years an recently got a job making 50% of his last salary. Remember, humble and genuine is attractive!

Honesty is the Best Policy – People lie about everything from education to experience to An Executive Recruiter can only present candidates that have NOT applied to the hiring company in the last 12 months. The first two questions I ask every candidate is “have you applied in any way, shape or form to the hiring company in the last 12 months?” and “do you have any compliance issues?” Recently I two situations where the candidate swore they had not applied, but in actuality had submitted a resume previously. So here is the deal Neil. First, if you applied and did not get interviewed, it’s because the company does not feel you are a fit for the job. Second, I’m not going to represent you going forward because I have a real affinity for honest people. Are you with me?

Just say NO To Drugs – Pretty straightforward, yes? Just had a $300,000 executive fail the drug test. Whaaat?? If you can’t pass the drug test, you won’t qualify for most jobs.

Bitter is NOT Attractive – The #1 reason executives don’t get the job.Companies want happy, positive, enthusiastic executives. Making negative statements about your last boss or company is a complete and total deal killer! A perfect example is Mike (again), who spent most of his time lamenting “how they could lay me off after all my years with the company.” That is why they make the windshield large and the rear view mirror small. Let go and let God.

Unrealistic Expectations – If I’m hiring for a CFO, I want candidates that have 5+ years of CFO level experience. Same with VP roles: 5+ years experience AT the VP level. I’ll get a dozen Managers and Directors with a note, “I can do this.” And they probably can, however companies don’t want to provide on the job training. They want executives that already did the job, at the level, for several years. And compensation is another challenge. Welcome to Depression 2.0. This is NOT the job market of ten years ago. Compensation has fallen drastically. Tim was an executive at $250K. Mostly because he was in the same job for ten years. Put him in for a $200K job, then after two months of interviewing he demanded $250K. Request denied. Tim remains unemployed.

Relationships Beat Talent Every Day of the Week – Believe it or not, most big cities are more like Mayberry RFD. In Las Vegas, there are two million people, however only two hundred people make most of the decisions…and they all know each other. Do NOT burn bridges. If someone likes you they will tell one friend. If someone does not like you, they will tell ten friends. At least once a week I hear, “He is probably a good executive, but Bob worked with him before. Pass.”Don’t burn your bridges!

Relationships are a Two Way Street – There is a scene in the Godfather where Bonasera is asking the Godfather for help. The Godfather responds, “Bonasera, we have known each other many years, but this is the first time you ever came to me for counsel or help. I can’t remember the last time that you invited me to your house for a cup of coffee, even though my wife is godmother to your only child. But let’s be frank here. You never wanted my friendship.” Remember, relationships are a two way street. Don’t be the person that falls off the map for five year years, and then cold calls everyone for a job. As an Executive Recruiter, I get that every day of my life. People that dismissed me and kicked dirt on me, then send me a resume when they get fired. The worst perpetrators? Human Resources executives. If I had $20 for every HR person that beat me up, then needed a job, I could retire. Always be kind to people…and stay in touch!