I enjoy watching Million Dollar Listing, the Bravo show about Realtors. The show strikes a chord with me because Realtors sell real estate and as an Executive Recruiter, I sell people.

In a recent episode, Realtor Ryan Serhant lost the biggest deal of his career – the opportunity to sell out a building in China. Ryan couldn’t get a business Visa due to the current political climate (tariffs, trade war) between the US and China. No Visa, no deal.

To add insult to injury, Ryan lost another major real estate deal the same day. He had been following up with a Developer for three years on a particular property. When he met with the Developer Ryan was shocked to find out they were interviewing other Brokers, and was even more surprised when they eventually selected a different Broker. He was OUT. That is one long day.

I own an Executive Recruiting company; my wife owns her book of business (insurance). We have something in common with Ryan Serhant – if we don’t sell, we don’t eat. No salary. We have to pay for our health insurance. No sick days or vacation days. Success is a product of activity, hustle and old fashioned hard work. Here are the three lessons I took away from Ryan’s longest day.

Lesson #1: Don’t Stress Over Things You Can’t Control – Stress is actually defined as worrying about situations or people you have no control over. Despite his best efforts, Ryan could not get a business Visa for China. It’s frustrating, but at the end of the day Ryan had no control over the situation. I once closed 9 deals in a row. On the other hand, I once lost 5 deals in a row that I thought were a cinch. Worrying and stressing out won’t change anything. Everything happens for a reason. Move on.

Lesson #2: Not Everyone Wants to be Your Friend – Ryan thought the Developer was his friend. And she probably is, however I can understand his disappointment when he was not selected for the project. Trust me, been there many times. Heck, half the people I get jobs don’t even say thank you. My wife had a big account for years. She saved them hundreds of thousands of dollars, fine-tuned their program (they were a mess!) and did an outstanding job in every aspect. One day a new person shows up and changes brokers. We thought we were personal friends with the CEO. Nope. My point is that not everyone wants to be your friend. Don’t go through life bitter and unhappy because people don’t meet your expectations. They rarely do.

Lesson #3: Never, Ever Give Up! – My Dad gave me plenty of great advice; however this was the best and most important: Never, ever give up. Some people learn from adversity, others are crushed by it. Put another way, anyone can win. The true test of character is how you lose. You can’t control how other people treat you, only how you react to it. No matter how poorly a day goes, get up the next morning and try again.